Saturday, June 30, 2018

6/30/2018 Caring Bridge

Journal entry by Joanne Negstad — 11 minutes ago
      "How are you?" people ask. "OK"  "As well as I could hope."  So goes many of my conversations. However, today, honestly, I'm uneasy.  What is that about, you might ask.  Perhaps if I write I'll gain some clarity myself.
    Haven't you ever found yourself uneasy without knowing why?  I know it has to do with absence.  But, what do I fear?  My singular routines seem ever more normal, and, I think that relates to my unease. Do I really want a normal in the presence of absence?  Why must I leave her behind?  Does this mean that she is less important?  There, I think that's it.  There's fear that she will be forgotten, even by me.
THAT makes me uneasy.
     What is 'normal', healthy, helpful, now into the third month of absence?  I don't know. I've never been here before and this new place makes me uneasy.

Blessings,

Al

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