Journal entry by Joanne Negstad — 22 minutes ago
"At first I was very afraid of going places where H. and I had been happy--our favorite pub, our favorite wood. But I decided to do it once--like sending up a pilot again as soon as possible after he'd had a crash. Unexpectedly, it makes no difference. Her absence is no more emphatic in those places than anywhere else. It's not local at all. I suppose that if one were forbidden all salt one wouldn't notice it much more in one food than another. Eating in general would be different, every day, every meal. It is like that. The act of living is different all through. Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything." C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed, p.11
This rings very true of my experience. One place seems no harder than another. Being alone in our condo is not harder that being anywhere else. The hardest time is the time after; after the reunion, after the conversation, after the surprise obituary, after the phone call, after the lunch....... Why is the "after" so difficult? It was during the afterthat we talked, shared, processed, compared notes, and observations. The presence of absence in the after is severely acute. There is no one who sees, thinks, interacts, observes, reflects, responds, as Joanne did. Her death gave me an irreplaceable loss which powerfully felt in the after.
Blessings,
Al
This rings very true of my experience. One place seems no harder than another. Being alone in our condo is not harder that being anywhere else. The hardest time is the time after; after the reunion, after the conversation, after the surprise obituary, after the phone call, after the lunch....... Why is the "after" so difficult? It was during the afterthat we talked, shared, processed, compared notes, and observations. The presence of absence in the after is severely acute. There is no one who sees, thinks, interacts, observes, reflects, responds, as Joanne did. Her death gave me an irreplaceable loss which powerfully felt in the after.
Blessings,
Al
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