Sunday, December 8, 2019

"If you love, you grieve..."

    Naturally I noticed this heading '"If you love, you grieve,'Lynch says, "and there are no exceptions.'" in the  BOOKS, Section  P.E11, of  December 8, 2019, Star Tribune.  Kevin Canfield reviews a new book by Thomas Lynch, The Depositions. Lynch is a funeral director who has written several books. Lynch wrote "Mourning is a romance in reverse, and if you love, you grieve and there is no exceptions."
    Matthew 5:4 "Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted."  "Grief is the human emotion that comes with loss, and mourning is the expression of that loss, i.e., those who express their grief shall be comforted" so said my spiritual director when we last met.
   "Mourning is romance in reverse"  "mourning is the expression of that loss" are ideas that bear serious reflection.
   
    In the summer of 1963 I made a housing transition from one basement apartment to another. Leaving the basement of Victor and Emma Halvorson's building, I moved into an apartment in First Lutheran Church, Sioux Falls. First Lutheran is a large downtown church and for my senior year of college I was resident  night watchman and assistant custodian which made me a colleague of Mary Hatlestad, nee Quam. Mary was parish secretary.  In 1964 Mary married Sam Hatlestad about a month before Joanne and I married. We remained in touch through the years though did not have much time together.
    When Joanne died Sam made a special point of befriending me. Sometimes the bereaved are ghosted, i.e., abandoned. Sam in an example of my experience of the opposite, friends who have "taken me under their wing" in my grief.  If Sam was present to his parishioners as he has been to me he was an excellent pastor.  With Mary's death yesterday it is my turn to care for him.

Takk for alt,

Al



   

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