Grief Abounds!

    First, it was a friend in contact via email. His wife died a few months ago after living with Alzheimer's a number of years. His inquiry; "Should I be having crying jags months after her death? She'd lived with Alzheimer's for a number of years." Shape up and get over it! is not what I said. Grief has its own time table and what is one person's experience is not necessarily true for another's. Mostly we need to feel what we feel without "oughts" or "shoulds."
    To get a bit of exercise, out of the wind and cold, I headed out into the skyway, the multi-miles elevated sidewalk that connects much of downtown Minneapolis. Shortly into my walk I met an acquaintance from my condo building. She told me her father's funeral was two weeks ago, which I missed because I was in Asia. Describing the difficulty she was having doing what needs to be done I reflected "Grieving takes energy, doesn't it?" "Wow! Does it ever," she responded. Those first days, months, or more functioning can be very difficult. Grief soaks up energy leaving little for anything else.
    Denizens of the land of grief are all about us. For me, these two experiences are important reminders to 'have my listening ears on.' Listen for the feelings and talk about the deceased! Who do you think the bereaved is thinking about?

    HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

Takk for alt,

Al