"I am not resigned."

Dirge Without Music

By Edna St. Vincent Millay 

I am not resigned to the shutting away of loving hearts in the hard ground.
So it is, and so it will be, for so it has been, time out of mind:
Into the darkness they go, the wise and the lovely.  Crowned
With lilies and with laurel they go; but I am not resigned.

Lovers and thinkers, into the earth with you.
Be one with the dull, the indiscriminate dust.
A fragment of what you felt, of what you knew,
A formula, a phrase remains,—but the best is lost.

The answers quick and keen, the honest look, the laughter, the love,—
They are gone.  They are gone to feed the roses.  Elegant and curled
Is the blossom.  Fragrant is the blossom.  I know.  But I do not approve.
More precious was the light in your eyes than all the roses in the world.

Down, down, down into the darkness of the grave
Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind;
Quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave.
I know.  But I do not approve.  And I am not resigned.

Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/dirge-without-music-by-edna-st-vincent-

millay

    Edna St. Vincent Millay is the poet who gave me my oft repeated phrase "the presence of absence" in another of her poems.  Perhaps her "And I am not resigned' is another phrase I may borrow. Now as I live in the land of grief I am reminded of Joanne and the presence of absence less often. But when she, and the loss of her, comes to mind "I am not resigned." Still, that absence feels so wrong and inappropriate.
    Contemplating a trip to The Little House On The Prairie this week gives me some satisfaction in anticipating a visit to Joanne's grave. There I will ponder even though "I am not resigned."

Takk for alt,

Al