Afraid

Self image is interesting and I like to think that I'm cognizant of self. An important part of my image of myself is that I'm non-anxious.  "Missed my flight? OK, can you book me...?" Likely there is, at least, a bit of truth in my perception that I'm low anxiety. That certainly wasn't always true but I've worked at being less fearful. Some of that comes with experience and age has given me much of that...'been there, done that.' Those of you who know me well may want to correct my perception.

    There is one thing that strikes fear in my heart. While I know it, and realize that it's not rational it still bothers me. The origin of this particular issue is very clear to me but that is only partially helpful in ameliorating my anxiety. It was imprinted on me in childhood.

   Do you want to know of what I'm afraid or shall I wait for a later post to reveal it? 🌝 OKAY, here goes...promise not laugh?  I fear being late, consequently I'm terminally early. Even when I try to be "fashionably late" I'm at least on time. It's a trait I learned from my father. Neighboring farmers used to joke that when they saw us going by on our way to church it was time for them to leave the barn and get ready to go! Consequently I'm almost never late, way early? yes, but seldom late. Being late provokes anxiety and I can't seem to help it.

   Ah, yes, nothing like wrestling with the big issues of life is there? Joanne? Seldom late but not afflicted with the anxiety I carried about lateness.

Takk for alt

Al