Journal entry by Al Negstad — 18 minutes ago
The memories, and the forgettings, of our Holden Village adventure as posted recently, stirred both gratitude and pain. Contemplating a possible return to Holden puts in stark relief the absence of presence. The thought of going back in my bereavement awakens such pain that I'm acutely aware of the depth of my loss. Additionally there are so many details that are not clear in my memory that I'd love to check with Joanne. Where are you when I need you?
Rollie Martinson accompanied me on this trip to The Little House on The Prairie. Before going to the house we visited Joanne's grave. Sweeping the grass clippings from her marker, I thought of all the times we tended her family's graves. The presence of absence remains real 15 months into life in the land of grief. See Anne Lamott's quote below...
“You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”
― Anne Lamott
Maybe I'm dancing with a limp and a lump in my throat.
Takk for alt,
Al
Rollie Martinson accompanied me on this trip to The Little House on The Prairie. Before going to the house we visited Joanne's grave. Sweeping the grass clippings from her marker, I thought of all the times we tended her family's graves. The presence of absence remains real 15 months into life in the land of grief. See Anne Lamott's quote below...
“You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”
― Anne Lamott
Maybe I'm dancing with a limp and a lump in my throat.
Takk for alt,
Al
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